Almost Noon! I didn't get up until almost noon! So weary was I from the previous days labors and joys. Thank goodness Le Duc has presence of mind to have the coffee ready. I started my day in a mad dash for the door! Stopping only long enough to dress, fly down the stairs and fill a cup as I grabbed for the keys to the red truck.

There was finance involved! I was rushing to get to the bank to cash a check so I'd have money for my return visit to New York Sunday and Lunch with friends. Lunch with friends, I know how that sounds, okay, lunch is a powerful motivator for me. I admit it I am someone who likes lunch, preferably al fresco, and with great leisure. (Sun & Shade,and lots of time, a good lunch should have both) So Sunday's plan was motivating me to great effect, Sunday lunches coming so rarely, and even more preciously in New York. There's something about eating with a view onto cityscape that I find stimulating to the appetite.

My Desk is really the center of the fluxus, I think. It vascillates from artwork/collecting junk, to being laid out with projects for completion and back again, depending on what is on the front burner that day. Tonight I am going to spend one hour clearing my desk, I have a lot of work to do and never enough time.

My Mother, Brother, Sisters and others gathered to celebrate My Nephew Lee's Birthday he turned 23 on Wednesday. I find it incredible that he is 23, How did he get so old? He is a great guy with a good heart and a very easy manner, I was never the uncle I might have wanted to be, but my door is always open to him and he knows that, Le Duc and I babysat him and his brother when they were kids and only saw them at Christmas and birthdays for years, it's nice to have them around again. I guess that's what family is really about, lolling about together in packs. Happy Birthday LFWIII. Great Cake!!

Lucky Penny fell out of my pocket at 6:30, I recovered it, but it didn't feel the same. I was very fortunate today, lucky too I guess, The Cake at the party was Black Forest! my favorite. Le Duc was able to get a replacement gas cap for the one I lost at the filling station on Thursday and was able to cash my check for me! So I guess it was a lucky day afterall. I have added 4 pennies back in to the "Lucky" pool since yesterday, leaving the penny change for purchases that come to .99 I've had 4 such transactions since yesterday. Odd that I noticed.

~Timothy

P.S- anything by Martin Fry and after a quick jog of the memory, "The icing on the cake", Stephen "tintin" Duffy



Friday July 30, 2004

  Luck

"Find a penny, pick it up, all the day you'll have good luck!" I found a lucky penny today at a traveller's stop on the Merrit Parkway when I was making my way home after a long drive to Bronxville, NY (A lovely city) The penny reminded me of the website Lucky World and the pennies that have been sent out across the planet in search of an answer to the questions of luck and pennies. I felt a surge of good fortune when I found mine. It was THAT shiney! Like the Lucky World site, I am going to track my pennies progress over the next 7 days and then send it along. When I was a younger person, waiting tables and coming home every night with buckets of coin, I used to regularly throw pennies out the window of the car, like seeds, hoping one day they would come back to me, I got one today from 1995.

The drive today was uneventful. (My mileage clock for the day was 315 miles not 375 as predicted yesterday, I never made it to Providence.) I have such sympathy for the folks who have to commute in heavy traffic everyday, well, maybe sympathy is not the word. I have contempt. The gas guzzlers! And people wonder why there is no mass transit, Why does everyone need a car in this country.(US) It is tantamount to being un-american if you don't own a car. I know, I went for a number of blissful years living in the city without one. The Gas has got to run out sooner or later, and I hope I don't have $40,000. tied up in metal and tires. My fondest hope is that in short order, I will be able to walk to work or work full time from the house, just so I don't have to get behind the wheel of the car unless I have a specific purpose. It was reported yesterday that the high cost of gasoline is responsible for fewer trips , by consumers to buy "wanted" items. It seems they save their gas for trips to buy necessary items and for commuting. It has also been reported that 2/3 of of the US economy is consumer based. (We're in a lot of trouble here) I would use public transport if it were availble in my area, or rather, if it went anywhere near the places I would go if I could catch a bus or a train. Sum it up to say, I am Glad I'm not a full time commuter here! I just don't know how folks can do it day in and day out.

I stopped in at my mom's house this evening, not something I get to do as often as I might like, I was in the door 2 mins and she had a pile of stuff to give me. (It is a thing with my family that no one ever visits the other without bestowing some stuff to take along with you, we all have a stuff gene) The items my Mom had selected were This, (close-up) and This and This plus a few linen items I needed to round out my collection. Le Duc calls my kitchen "the land of misfit plates" and I have linen to match. I could serve probably 60 people all with their own. Place settings and napkins. I like service ware. What can I say? occupational hazard. The other items she layed on me were too funny, the shirt is a pajama top from when I was 6 or 7, The knights and castles should have been a clue that I was a burgeoning queen! The cub scout badges were earned by me, in cub scouts. I got as far as "Weblos" (apt term, considering how much I hated scouting in general) and quit scouts. I remember the ceremony at which I was presented the two badges. I had worked so hard and was finally being recognized, as is always the case in scouting, there were many others who worked harder and got farther up the ladder, I never really stood a chance in scouts, I questioned too much. "Why?" has always been a big question for me.

My lucky penny saw me home safely and although I didn't win tonight's Lotto Drawing, There is always hope. Every day I wake up believing I am Fortunate but I am absolutely feeling lucky today.

~Timothy



Thursday July 29, 2004

  Motion

Today was spent in constant motion. I washed clothes, swept and dusted the screened-in porch, washed the truck, washed more clothes, removed old drapes, hung new drapes, vaccuumed and rearranged 2 rooms and an attics worth of furniture.

I forgot to eat breakfast or lunch, drank way too much coffee and when I finally settled in to the redesigned living room I turned the Television on just as John Kerry was beginning his speech. I'm not sure if I hadn't been so tired if he would have riveted me to my seat, My "rabble" has been roused for some time now and I was just glad to see that the democrats are finally catching up.

This evening the telephone rang and it was a member of the town democratic committee calling for Le Duc. It was a reminder call to some primary coming up in August. The funny thing is, The telephone is in my name and I have been a registered Democrat longer than Le Duc but they asked for him. (They actually asked for "Jim", Not Le Duc's name at all, he has never been a "Jim")another funny thing, The Caller ID indicated it was a wireless call, The world's a changing ain't it?

Off to Bronxville, NY tomorrow morning then to Providence, RI in the evening. I should end the day having clocked about 375 miles. It will be a long day.

~Timothy

P.S.- "Only that day dawns to which we are awake"
                      --Henry David Thoreau.
Can anyone tell me what this means????



Tuesday July 27, 2004

  Art

I spent this morning peering into the studio of an artist in her 80's.

My view gave me hope.

Growth is not something I have any power to control.

It will happen.

Forward in all directions and I am smiling about it.

This is inevitable.

Each day has love in it

Definitely a necessary ingredient.

~Timothy

P.S.-The Soundtrack from Bridget Jone's Diary is really quite nice.

Sunday July 25, 2004

  My cup runneth over.

This morning I made the start up pot of coffee for the house. We have a braun coffee maker that has a floating ball-o-meter to tell us when we have filled the water compartment to capacity for brewing, I always overfill it and this morning was no different. For years I worked in restaurants, making countless pots of coffee, I tell Le Duc the reason I don't make coffee at home is because I made my life-quota of pots during my tenure as a waiter. I want it to magically appear in the pot like it did for all those diners in my restaurants.

Except for a brief foray out to buy smokes, I have not left the house all weekend, not even to go out into the yard. The weather has been hot, grey and humid; today looks like it might be the day I get out the door for half a moment. My propensity towards reclusion is very strong these days. I simply don't want to leave the house.

For years I was always out of the house, looking for whatever, wherever, whenever. Now, I just want to be free from the struggle. I have had it up to here with the world. So much hate, So many scowling crabs. For a while now It has been my mission to say hello or greet each person I come across, sometimes with a nod, or a "hello" or "good morning" you know, a greeting, and acknowledgment of the fact that for just a moment we are sharing the same walkway, aisle, or transport. Surprisingly, most people say "hello" back. But in a furtive way, like they are suspicious or afraid. Has this world become so gripped with fear? Maybe that's what has kept me indoors.

This past week I spent time with Mrs. Pinko and Vaska, Two women that I admire greatly and value for their commitment to making the world a better place. I don't know If I have it in me to make that kind of commitment. It is easier to stay indoors and let the time slide by without really picking a direction. When did I become so complacent?

~Timothy



Friday July 23, 2004

  This Just In!

  The New Photo Page at Herein0440!

~Timothy



Thursday July 22, 2004

  I can't find the words to describe how I feel today

  Don't Oppress My Ass!


  Monotheistic Propaganda Assault


  Fuels More Antagonism

~Timothy



Wednesday July 21, 2004

  I, Homo

   I, Robot was worth the price of admission ($9.25, thank you very much!)for the bed shots of Will Smith and the long-view Shower Ass shot. Mr. Smith is aging very well on camera. I was truly suprised by how much I liked him in this movie. I went with my favorite movie buddy, so it was a great time. "Time Crisis" the game is great at the Arcade in Worcester's Showcase North. Talk about a shoot em up! Wow, I pumped $5.00 worth of quarters in without thinking about it, worth every cent and perfect to get you hyped up for an action movie!
  I think Mr. Asimov would have liked I,Robot the themes were all there.

  Tuesday night I went with My friend Mrs. Pinko to play in the "spontaneous exhibition" of art at The Buttonwood Tree" with Vaska! We cut paper, glued paper, folded paper, painted paper, painted tiles, moved mosaics, shifted furniture and generally "shook up the mix" Art is like cooking, it often takes time to get the ingredients some need to ripen, some need thawing, some need chopping and sometimes you need to use something some one else has already worked on. The results vary in much the same way as cooking and are enjoyed or not in much the same percentages, I'd imagine. Some suits your taste, and some doesn't! We had a great time and ate vietnamese food to boot! I love Middletown CT. It is a vibrant and colorful city and full of life. The energy runs down the street like an electric current. I lived there for a time and never connected with it as I do now that I am more mature. I believe Middletown is the center of a very strong FLUXUS. We created "auchtothonic" books, I think. I am busy in my workroom making way for the new inspiration I gathered up while visiting and working with two beautiful women. Vaska and Mrs. Pinko YOU Rock!

  The FMA is not over with yet. DOMA is back in action as a catalysat for change. "THEY" have been laying the ground work for all this tripe for years. How to stop them? I still think an All Gay work stoppage would put the ring in it. But without protections of basic equality how could we do that, wouldn't everyone be afraid of losing their jobs. Maybe a big GAY Union. "The LGBTFU2" Oh, I forgot, Gay unions are illegal. Funny how easy it is to take things for granted.

  Le Duc has moved out of the beautifully painted office (I remodelled while he was away in February) and into the old TV Room downstairs (which I also remodelled about 1.5 years ago) It looks like it will work out well. He has a great new drawing space with good light and I have access to the Office items needed to keep the ship afloat. Change is good. Shaking it up is good. It's all good. goodnight!

~Timothy



Monday July 19, 2004

  Cranky and Tired. Long..Long.. Sunday and Monday.

  I spent the last two days driving in The Presidential Range of the White Mountains in New Hampshire. My bed is calling to me and I must away. I took pictures!

~Timothy



Saturday July 17, 2004 4:17PM

  Three Count em' Three

  A Thursday: One of those days that started one way and kept flipping into something else all day. I started out at an event meeting about parking cars. I am not now, nor have I ever been, a competent valet parker. I'd much rather hand back coats and wraps than hand back car keys. My Plans for the day changed as my schedule filled with tasks I couldn’t imagine before the meeting. I got to design and order 2 ballon arrangements and glue white stars with Movie Titles to gold stars for table decorations. I did enjoy Thursday, twists and turns can sometimes be exciting. Never mind, forward in all directions!

(The parking of cars is, I believe a growth industry in the US, judging by my observations at the events of the party goers on Friday, many people simply do not know how to park their cars in a way that is considerate to others and contributes to the aestethic landscape of any venue. Valet service should be left to college age kids who do not understand the inherent difficulties of car ownership and see the cars as objects of desire as opposed to reflections of their owners personalities.)



  A Friday:Party day, My valet parker is not going to be able to make it, so I will substitute with two 15year old boys to point the cars in the right direction. I attended the “set-up” hour, the ladies of the board arrived with everything needed to assemble a night's festivities, much activity and flower arranging and the barn was suitably dressed and they all left to get ready for the party. I had a moment to rest in the afternoon, complete with a brief lie down with Le Duc and Baxter. The party, as always, was a success, aren’t they all?

Everyone had a great time, the dancing was something to see and I got the pick of hors d’oeuvres as I passed from the kitchen. The evening was beautiful, the party was held in a barn on top of a hill nearby, the night sky was so full of stars! As this group is totally capable of amusing themselves I had leisure to enjoy the summer night. Being grateful for the work is sometimes not enough.



  A Saturday Not quite complete yet. I drove to the city of Boston this morning for work. It was a nice morning for a drive. The weather was lovely with puffy clouds and a breeze.

I am currently contemplating what to pack in my valise for the next 2 days, I am off on a job to New Hampshire, The White Mountains. This trip was one of the twists and turns from Thursday. I will drive North on Sunday and return South Monday evening. I enjoy these little excursions. This one is to provide transportation for someone attending the funeral of a good friend.

These trips are interesting to me in the same way some of the parties I work are, I get to attend but don’t actually have any “stake” in the proceedings. At the parties I know most of the people, from years of being in this small community , but attend the party as a worker, holding the ambience together. As an experienced server I can create "personal invisibility" and can enjoy the gathering from a unique vantage point. ( i could do the same thing with my blanket when I was 4)

Watching people in social groups is fascinating to me, the only difference between the driving and the parties is, after the parties there is a “post mortem” a recap of all the events and personalities gathered with other attendees or workers in a spirit of shared experience. The Driving jobs are a little more introspective, I keep most of my observations to myself and just allow the time to wash over me as I focus on the task at hand. (Although, I am fortunate in having gracious and interesting people to drive, many older folks with great stories)

The "Quaint" more rural aspects of our culture; talking, writing, society... are disappearing at an alarming rate, and with it some of our cutural history, I'm soaking it up as fast as I can for reflection as time goes by.

Our country is so diverse. You wouldn't always be able to see this with Television, Consumerism and a wider world view invading our daily lives. While I am clearly dumbfounded by the eerie "Homogeny" being superimposed over our Larger Culture,(All newscasters sound the same everywhere) I am equally struck with the "local" culture that still clings so tightly in some areas. I always want to stop and see what the music is like there, what the flowers smell like, what kind of food they have, "how does the sun feel on your face here?" I want to get to know a place. The People of the US are really pretty cool.

Taking note of these things is tough when you are piloting a 2 ton car at 72 MPH. (of course, I mean 65 MPH.) and respecting the space of the person who has engaged you for the duty. Le Duc calls it "Driving Miss Lazy" I call it. "All in a days work". Sunday will be 5 hours behind the wheel. Zoom! Zoom!


Now to packing…..

Sunday Driving: Khakis- Knit Shirt – brown socks – boat shoes– web belt- Undershirt-micro-fibre boxers (bring 2 pair each)

Sunday Dinner: Collar Shirt-brown belt. Sunday Bathing Suit.
Monday Services: light Khakis – Green Venture “ever pressed” tab collar dress shirt –- Blue Blazer –Red/gold Tie–oxford shoes-more brown socks-brown belt.
Monday Driving: Same as above.

Rings/Watch/Glasses Toiletries: Razor, Aveeno Shave Cream, Chanel apres rasage moisturizer, Pepsodent, toothbrush, Q-tips, Band-aid, Givenchy Firm Profile cream for bedtime! Wintergreen oil.

Mobile Phone
Magazine du jour
Walpole book

~Timothy



Wednesday July 14, 2004

  Victory? I sure hope it's a signal.

  So Herein is the roll call from the vote. Very close, but no cigar. Thank you for the "nays", Senators. My faith in our system is on it's way to being restored. Liberty and Justice for ALL!

~Timothy



Tuesday July 13, 2004

  Here's the elephant pushing the hate wagon.

  Yesterday on CSpan I saw the faces of some of the folks pushing so hard on this Federal Marriage Amendment, A chill ran down my spine as they each in turn spoke about the importance of this "legislation".

  It seems to me a case of trying to make the world over in their image. Read the mission statement and the advisory council list.

  Their home page says "Catholic Bishops give strong endorsement for AFM's FMA..." That's enough for me to want to fight it tooth and nail. I know about those guys, I survived 12 years of their special brand of hatemongering. Their ideas about marriage kept women and children oppressed for decades.

  All over the AFM's webpage reference is made to "fatherhood". What up with that?

  COMPLETELY UNRELATED and on a lighter note see "Irish Language Lab" in the "Formosa Diner" Videos Section from "The Monkee's" Mike Nesmith. Talk about "I love the 90's"

~Timothy



Monday July 12, 2004

  72 hours later....

  On Sunday the "Town" Here in NECT more than fulfilled their promise of a Fireworks Show! The sky above our yard was full of the most spectacular display of sparks the town has ever put forth. For almost 30mins I held my breath, I got to sit next to my Mom, in my yard, during the event which made it all the nicer. WOW! Have I mentioned how much I love this town? I truly do. As we were eating meats grilled on my newly assembled (thank you Asilann)Barbecue Grill, 3 Hot Air Balloons wafted over the horizon just NE of our house. (With my family collected below they probably divined a current of hot air and were looking for a lift.) All were in Rainbow patterns not unlike the NBC Peacock. It really was a great day.

  Jimbo's (see link below)posting about the FMA really got me going. I had a head full of the impending Federal Marriage Amendment vote. It Stinks. This is not a good thing for anyone, forget for a moment that it is being touted in the media as a "gay issue" and look at it from a legal stand point, as in Constitutional Law, the Constitution by which the freedoms, we sometimes take for granted, are spelled out. I personally think there are still enough people of good conscience in this country who will make certain, by letting their representatives know, that there are other far more important things we should be spending our time debating in Congress. That said I have to ask who is making this such a difficulty, is it really a religious issue? Can religion in our country be capable of the same kind of sweeping changes brought forth by the Taliban in Afghanistan? Changes that don't keep equal and sacred the tenets of democracy, where each man is created equal under the eyes of the law. Haven't we had these discussions already? Woman's rights, Civil Rights for all and the other equally important issues that I had thought already decided until now.

  If the Constitution can be amended in a spirit of separating any one "man" as being different and deserving different rights under the law, isn't that a dangerous thing? I would have to say, gut feeling, yes.

  Anyway, If I step away from the very powerful feelings this raises in me and believe me, after hearing the word faggot spoken in your general direction over years and years stepping away from the feelings is a tough one. I would have to say the timing of these discussions couldn't be more strange, I have asked for change and I am certainly asking for my rights to be equal to everyone else's, But Why now? just before the election? is it to further stratify the loose coalitions of more liberal (I hate that word) Humanist democratic groups? I mean, what do the members of the NAACP think about gay marriage? How does NOW feel about gay marriage? I'm sure their positions are there to be discovered. I'm sure I would agree or disagree with them and you know what, it will all take time to sort out. I don't believe that the FMA will even pick up full steam, at least I hope it doesn't, time is passing and young men and women are still dying in Iraq.

   Just in case it does pick up speed, I think we should be ready. I'm going to make a sign. The first one I remember making me want to think outside my self was "silence=death" Still powerful but not quite right. Maybe something like "Where's the Beef?" I wonder what Eleanor Roosevelt would have thought? (See article 16:1,2 and 3) Let's amend the constitution to say THAT!!!!!!!!! Peace. Later.

~Timothy



Saturday July 10, 2004

  Activism and the 21st century

Don't miss this at Jimbo's Very well said and full of honest meaning.

~Timothy



Friday July 9, 2004

  Four Days: just four days

A Tuesday: Filled with Worry about the pool on the hill. After the deluge of rain received Monday I was concerned there might be a tree in the pool, it was that hard a storm. The Pool was safe and I needed little coaxing to dive head long into the deep end. Followed by a trip to the Supermarket Trader Joe'swhere I stocked up on coffee and staples to fuel Le Duc's cooking frenzy. Can I just say here that Morello Cherries and Greek yogurt with ginger granola drizzled with dark honey should be on a dessert menu somewhere?

A Wednesday: Up at the crack and on my way to the hill to Vaccuum the pool. (Pools take an enormous amount of tending in the initial stages of stabilization, we opened this one only last week) There appears to be a small leak in the finely tuned system, I have a hunting project on my hands. I love a challenge. Discovering where the leak is will be a fun exercise and an excellent excuse to get wet. I'm up to 8 laps! In the late afternoon my middle sister "Asilann" stopped by with some groceries. On an earlier visit she opened my refridgerator and discovered within barren whiteness, My entire family has a thing, learned from our mom, with being unable to bear the whiteness of a lightly stocked fridge It should be jam-packed with every conceivable variety of food or the space is wasted. The number of bags carried from her trunk into my kitchen were equal to 3 months of shopping on my part. I am certainly grateful for the bounty, but still remain awed by the volume. Le Duc and I are almost daily shoppers, save a few tins of pate, some mustard, crackers and biscuits, our larder is only lightly provisioned at regular intervals as budget allows. I feel a dinner party coming on.....It's been a long time.

A Thursday: My life changed this morning at about 9:30am, I allowed my mind and mouth to accept occupation that completely agrees with my heart. Working with a group that does extremely good work, making the world a little better one project at a time. The monies they allocate impact whole communities in ways that will be appreciated for generations, benefiting the entire community equally. That's impact! My role within the organization will allow me to lend support to the people actually doing the good work and will allow me access to a field of great interest to me, foundation building. I will gain experience and knowledge in concepts and procedures that will have long lasting benefits to me as a person. It feels like the first day of school, the one I was excited about. I like the idea of my labors contributing in a tangible way. Today was a "first step on the path" kind of day. I will get my butt to Paris on this path, I can feel it. OUI! Today also marked the day I acquired, for review, a copy of Hugh Walpole's "Harmer John" I have waited a long time to find this copy. OUI!OUI! I am happy.

A Friday:up again, sun filtering through the curtains a cool breeze coming in the window. The Smell of Fresh Coffee, made with Spring water, wafting up the stairs from our kitchen. (the town's water supply burst in front of the Town Hall just down the street this morning, apparently turning the water a nasty brown color, as it is, Le Duc and I rarely drink our town water, I am repulsed by the smell way before I ever get to color, It's bleachy fresh)The birds chirping...la la la, I woke up happy and full of energy (see Thursday) I drove/worked for a few hours, then came home to find a friend on my doorstep a very interesting friend, Mr. Pinko.He's studying Joyce's Ulysses this summer. (I have not read Joyce in years and don't know what might compel me to do so at this point.) Mr. Pinko is always an interesting converstionalist. He studied Zen in Japan and teaches English at a local Prep School. I like contrasts like that. I planted grass seed along the back edge of the property during our "blue hour" and hosed down the driveway. Le Duc and Baxter are waiting for me upstairs. It is now 11:30PM. Friday is almost over here in nect and the air is cool, a great night for sleeping with the windows open.

~Timothy



Monday, July 5, 2004

If you are American or know any please read Molly Ivins Herein It can't be all bad news, all the time.

I'm going for a post a day for the month of July, I have a few drafts that I need to drop into place, Why I save in drafts I don't know. Often times after getting the draft started I lose my place/train of thought get distracted or censor my words. All these posts are exercises in writing, communicating and typing. I'm going to work on the drafts after this post.

The Big Fireworks picnic to be held this evening in my Back Yard was unavoidably postponed until next Sunday. The Fact that the town was providing the entertainment did a lot to sway my plans, It was also extremely wet today and the damp is still hanging in the air so good thing all around. Next Sunday should be fun! Between you and me I was more than a little relieved, after all the swimming I did yesterday, I was ready for a quiet night at home, getting it a night sooner than expected was cause for well a quiet night.

Le Duc has been cooking a lot of meals lately, this evening he tried his hand at Pad Thai, not a bad job of it either. My Korean friend, on her departure, presented me with a freezer full of ingredients for some memorable meals. I was only slightly taken aback this afternoon when the bag of "Seafood Mix" from Thailand I thawed turned out to be full of interesting bits of seafood. Octopus, cuttlefish, cooked shrimp and imitation crabmeat, quite a bounty. Le Duc was dubious, I shall have to cover with sufficient sauce to render the little shrimp heads invisible. That will be for Thursday dinner. It will be helpful to taste many of the ingredients added to my larder in the safety and comfort of my own home, as I am, at turns, fascinated and slightly awed with the Asian groceries that dot Boston, many have excellent produce.

Do I have to see Fahrenheit 9/11 in the theatre, or can I wait for the DVD? I am reading reviews, it is causing discussion, that must be good.

The Rain today was so powerful! Just what we needed, It was feeling a little dry and the water gets scarce here in August, so I'm glad to have my flower beds drenched. Still digging....Almost done with the foundation work, although I discovered I need to build a retaining wall around the terrace structure, no worries, I think I have an Idea of how to do it, I've been asking everyone and reading what I can find. By mid-august we'll be on the terrace (Shadiest spot in the garden in the afternoon!)

~Timothy



Sunday, July 4, 2004

At the beginning of the year I told myself this would be the summer I would get into a Kayak and paddle my ass to good health. Today I got in that Kayak! and promptly paddled myself into the deep water and rolled the thing over, barely missing hitting with my kayak the cutest guy (save le duc) at the lake. Oh the joys of summer. Upon my arrival at the fabulous lakeside party the hostess asked me to get the boys off their chairs (three teenage boys with a case of boredom). I not only got them off their chairs, I got them all into boats! They came out to rescue me. The only rescuing I needed was the kind that soothes my injured ego. Not only did I capsize the kayak, but the first person on the seen was a blonde haired twelve year old girl, floating on a little raft peering over the rim of the tube to ask me if I needed any help. SLAM! (I was heartened to have someone of that generation being so polite, good for her parents!) But man was my guy ego wounded. I did swim most of the 1/4 mile back to the beachfront, and only tied the kayak to the sunfish (one of the 4 boats dispatched to render aid) because I was embarrassed that they went to the trouble of coming out for me. Ahh the joys of Summer. July 4th today, and I here and now state my independence. Floating and swimming along with a boat full of water in tow was the perfect tonic for getting me out of the poor-me attitude I have harbored for some weeks. I can do anything I set my mind to and find the joy in it. The water was lovely and I can't think of a better way to have spent it than in the pursuit of fun on the lake. For some of you reading this you may have noted a fondness and yearning of mine for a pool to swim in, today, not only did I get to swim in the crystal clear pool, I also swam in the clear waters of a local lake. What a day. Now I go and mow the lawn.

Happy 4th of July! My wish for today is true freedom and independence for all people. Pursue some fun today, life is too short. P.S.-If I get the pictures everyone took of me drowning, I will share them here. Thanks s&b for a great day at the lake!

Comments are unusually difficult to use on blogger. So I may be switching the whole magilla to live journal. later this evening. any thoughts?

~Timothy



Thursday, July 1, 2004

It was a not the best week in blogland, at least, not out my window to it. Jimbo, troubled-diva (now with more hyphen), Ralf,BW, Sashinka, even Oddverse seemed a little , well....odd. Read back at any of those pages and you will see the last ten days or so, were not the best days of the summer for a good number of people. I could point to a few more, but would rather add my log of miseries. My heart, of course, sincerely goes out to all who are experiencing life in painful ways.

My Mom was in the ICU, she's better now.
My eldest Sister has contracted that rare, but rascally erlichiosis (bigger nastier bacteria in the lyme disease range)
On the way to an appointment Wednesday morning, Le Duc and I literally ran out of gas (brilliantly coasting downhill to the nearest filling station almost a mile away! Not really misery, but it sucked in a big way.) For me, that experience was followed by a grueling 4 hour drive down RTE 95 to Norwood, NJ (Near Tenafly) in a Big Box Truck loaded with my favorite Korean's worldly goods. The truck was huge and the traffic was unbearable, how people commute to work in autos is beyond me, I want a subway (thanks sashinka). After unloading the belongings to the beautiful townhouse, we supped at Korean Palace New Jersey (very nice, I love Korean food) I arrived home from NJ at 11:30PM and had time for a nap (after decompressing from driving the above mentioned truck north into the wilds of New Jersey along what appeared to me to have been, at one time, a goat path clinging perilously to the ridge at a place called Bear Mountain. If I didn't have the craggy Tor to worry about, I might be tempted to go back there, t'was breathtaking and fairly reeked with Colonial History of the Native American/English/French/Hessien Variety) After my nap, I arose at 4AM to drive to Boston to drop off the son of a friend at the Airport, he's off to The city of Oxford for some Shakespearean Cult worship and beer. I did get to drive a kicky little BMW 325c Red with black interior. I love the idea of performance cars, but have too much of a "worker" mentality to ever believe I could seriously own one, they are just a little ridiculous, but with the top down and the sun shining I didn't care about the proletariat, I was digging the scene. Got home about 9AM. after paying for the Rental Truck I rented from Budgerit .80 cents a mile (New Jersey is 150 miles away, and I took the long way home, the math was staggering)

Along the way this week I have read, listened and talked my way through a million things. The amount of information coming in is just amazing. Finding the place where I could quiet my mind for a nap today I realized that I am just crammed full of too much of everything.

I need a vacation. Preferably Paris, But I'll take the beach or even poolside. Just one week free of worry. Worry about the house and how screwed we are getting on our mortgage, worry about taxes and how we pay stupid amounts and never seem to be caught up, worry about insurance on house and car, Our Agent wants us to sign a "Domestic Partnership" clause in our policy, raising our rates and still not covering us in the way we need to be covered. While staring at the forms I realized I DO NOT want a domestic partnership, I already have one, Le Duc and I agree and disagree and negotiate and plan and its no ones damn business how or why we do, Especially when it comes to their taking their idea of that relationship and defining it in a way that doesn't actually fit the bill. We do have a domestic partnership, but if you want to really be clear about our partnership, it is a MARRIAGE, No ifs ands or buts about it and I want the rights and responsibilities that come with that definition as prescribed in our constitution (Pre-DOMA) not the rights and responsibilities as described in the form my insurance company wants us to sign. We will sign it, I am not stupid, nor do I wish to put at any greater risk what James (who will be from this point on referred to as le Duc/ or LD, its a writing device I have used journalistically for years and would like to transfer it to here, as I rarely take pen in hand anymore.) As I was saying, I do not wish to put at any greater risk what le Duc and I have built to this point, so I will sign this paper which doesn't really communicate our relationship, but will allow us to keep our rather hard to understand insurance company Pierless, I feel a little off shore with them at the moment. The rate is good, but the coverage is confusing.

So there you have it. Sickness, deprivation, anxiety, taxes and insurance. All in a week's time. With intermittent periods of fast cars, exotic food, youthful exuberance, taxes and insurance. And it all starts over for me again tomorrow. I still have not completed half of the things on the master "To Do" list that were slated for this week. But I will have a pool to jump into if the temp is right, Finally, the Thompson swimming Pool is about ready. Summer will really begin with my first plunge.

~Timothy



Web Log Archives...